Friday, August 23, 2013

The Adoption

I don't know how much of this journey towards adoption from Uganda I have shared here, but just in case some of you don't know and are interested, here is a bit of how we got here:
(This was originally written as an answer to some questions written by another family interested in adopting from Bethel House)
  • Nate and I always planned for four children, and in our arrogance thought that maybe sometime much later we would adopt. I think for Nate it was a "when we are financially stable" kind of thing. After Bethany was born we expected to be able to have another child right away. This didn't happen. Instead of lessening my desire for a fourth child, waiting just reinforced my desire. I was so sure our family was supposed to grow. Nate's desire was not as strong--but He felt God's leading toward that as well. One day it just hit me--WHAT are we waiting for?---Why not begin the adoption process now? I was sure that Nate would shoot down the idea or at least put it off for a while, but after reading up on all the ways that money is available for adoption, he was just as excited about it as I was. Our desire to provide a home for children who might otherwise be aborted led us to domestic adoption. So we started the process and 6 months later we were officially a waiting family at Bethany Christian. A year later, our book had been shown many times. We realized that we would have to pay for and redo our home study because it had expired. At the same time, friends of ours, Troy and Sarah were gathering info on Bethel House in Uganda and then deciding to go and get their Ezra Derek. We heard about the many children at Bethel House Orphanage who were waiting for families. After several conversations with Sarah, again I felt that, "What are we waiting for?" feeling. With the cost at Bethel House, we had already raised enough to adopt one from there. So we switched from Bethany Christian to Bethel House and here we are. As to how our biological children and our adopted children will mesh, we are depending a lot on the wisdom of others. We have watched other families here on Lookout Mountain adopt and we are leaning on their experience! One family here on the mountain has 4 biological children and they are about to go back to China for their 3rd set of two siblings!! (For a total of 10 children!) We have done A LOT of talking about the boys with our biological kids ever since we chose them (not to mention the year and a half of talking about the baby we might adopt). Naomi, Jacob and Bethany realize that there are going to be challenges: the language barrier, the different color of skin, and the general havoc of adding 2 more children to the mix. They don't know the extent of those challenges (neither do Nate and I) and that's probably a good thing. We will deal with the challenges as they come. It would probably be better to ask Nate how he has overcome the fear of adopting because he is the one of us in this couple that has the healthy dose of fear--and by fear I really mean the ability to see and understand the difficulties. I usually just rush head-on into situations without counting the cost. My fears have all been related to the waiting!! God has taught us both to step out of comfort zones and it is a beautiful thing. We have been challenged lately by a thought from Pastor Hitchings from many years ago, "What are you doing in your life that would not be at all possible without the Holy Spirit?" We tend to only do the things that we deem possible and forget that our God is a God of the impossible. Impossible things like adopting two children from Uganda.

1 comment:

Audra said...

It is good to read this and to hear your hearts so concisely written, but evident. I know this has been a long journey, full of emotional twists and turns, but I know God holds your hearts and those of your children! We will continue to pray and standby as cheerleaders. :)